My question is why my boyfriend is being so sensitive about the request I made. I have been dating my Jamaican boyfriend for several months and one morning I decided to read a text message that led me to believe he was cheating. At this point I don't know if he was communicating inappropriately or not. However, I told him I wanted him to get his things and be gone by the time I get home and leave my key. We did not live together but he spent the weekends we me and my daughters.
He told me that in Jamaican when you tell someone to leave your house that means you are through with them. He says he will come back one day but hasn't won't tell me when and it's going on 2 months. Is there anything I can do to speed up the progress of him coming back?

okay, i'll bite... you told him to leave because you suspect he's been unfaithful, but now you're wondering why he won't come back? do you really want him back? IMO if he hasn't been trying to reconcile, he's moved on... jamaicans usually don't give up on something they truly want very easily from my experience

i truly wish the best for you, but from the (very limited) info you've shared, he's not the best for you or your family...

Three words....keep it movin!

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btw... if i'm reading this right, he will of course come back... when the next one tires of his antics...

oh, welcome btw, i'm fairly new on these boards too, so i feel a little odd saying that

You're right limited info. After I realized that I reacted with out all of the info. I went to apologize. That was a long conversation. But, before I left he explained how I hurt him but he does love me and he will forgive and we have been together and "give me another chance". But he says it will take a while for him to return to the house. However, I go to his home and we go out of town and do other things normal couples. He just has not been willing to come to the house yet. But my main question is if anyone can answer. Are Jamaican's that strict on their beliefs especially when it comes to a home that you have been welcomed in?

I'm new too but thanks for the response I feel that will happen too.

sorry.. our posts crossed paths...

any man (jamaican or not) who i've been in a relationship with and fought with and such has left in a huff but come back like nothing is wrong in a day or two (literally, without even discussing it(esp jamaicans here)... they usually just need a day to clear their heads)... unless of course they had other more interesting places to be

i hope your guy is a good one and just very sensitive and from a very strict/old school family or something, but i've not heard of such a thing personally... maybe i'm a pesismist, but i'd keep my guard up if something don't seem right...

how has he reacted to the accusitions of the cheating? what exactly did the text message say if you don't mind me asking? has he justified it? has he been readily available to you while he's been out of your house?

sorry...nosey, but the whole situation isn't adding up to me personally...

Well I can speak from my own experience.......and my ex BF had no problem at all comin to my house loooong after we broke up and i asked him not to come any more...he would just show up and ask me to give him another chance.....he was relentless

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men in general, but jamaicans specifically can be very relentless when they loose or think they are loosing something they really want

It is crazy. I have access to him at anytime I can go to his apt or his family home any time unannouced. I stay the night when my girls are away nights on end. I think in his mind he is trying to get a point across. It is crazy. Does anyone have any information on good books about dealing with the jamaican man and jamaican culture.

btw.... again with the pessimism but i can't help but notice that somehow in all this he's made you out to be the bad person and he will eventually forgive you and "give you another chance"... a little narassistic isn't it if he was infact being unfaithful?

again, only having a part of the picture, this sounds all too much like my ex who wasn't doing a thing right by me and still somehow tried to twist the situation to try to make me feel guilty and as if i was the one who wronged him.... very manipulative technique and if he is at all in the same cateogry, i'd run in the opposite direction, far and fast...

i'm on a hormonal and slightly negative night, so if i'm totally misreading your situation, sorry!

I do understand. He really does a lot of good things. No... he isn't like you described your ex to be. I think he's a bit confused, and I choose that word cautiously. He just needs to get over himself. I understand the hormone thing. That too shall pass.

Well he isn't acting this way because he is jamaican......he is acting this way cause he is a man....and it sounds to me like a man who is taking something way to far.....unless there is more to the story than you have told.

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Here's a thought.....ask him WHY he's not coming back, and tell him to get over it.

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Agreeeeeeeeeeeeeed!