Morons of the year - Jamaica Talk

LuvJamaicanMen · #1 (**permalink**) 03-03-2005, 10:07 AM

Presenting the top morons of the year...

1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP?
AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.

2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS:
Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please come out and give yourself up."

3. WHAT WAS PLAN B???
An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from own his bank accounts.

4. THE GETAWAY!
A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop, and asked for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked at the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.

5. DID I SAY THAT???
Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn't control himself during a line-up. When detectives asked each man in the line-up to repeat the words: "Give me all your money or I'll shoot," the man shouted, "That's not what I said!"

6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING??
A man spoke frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the doctor asked. "No!" the man shouted, "This is her husband!"

7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!!
In Modesto, California, Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun, but unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket. (hellllllooooooo!)

8. THE GRAND FINALE
Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, California, some folks, new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 ft. boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every manoeuvre, no matter how much power was applied.

After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted to a nearby marina, thinking someone there could tell them what was wrong.

A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the out drive went up and down, and the prop was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath.

He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard. NOW REMEMBER...THIS IS TRUE ... Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer

bountyx · #2 (**permalink**) 03-03-2005, 10:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luv

2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS:
Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please come out and give yourself up."

I am just imagining the looks of consternation on the faces of those cops. lol

Thx Luv. U have started off my day with a good laff.

LuvJamaicanMen · #3 (**permalink**) 03-03-2005, 10:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bountyx

I am just imagining the looks of consternation on the faces of those cops. lol

Thx Luv. U have started off my day with a good laff.

Glad I did....Seargent X!!

HotanSpicy · #4 (**permalink**) 03-03-2005, 10:21 AM

MI cya tek dem ya kinda tings fus ting inna di mawnin...................mi belly

LuvJamaicanMen · #5 (**permalink**) 03-03-2005, 10:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HotanSpicy

MI cya tek dem ya kinda tings fus ting inna di mawnin...................mi belly

yuh dun know spicy.....LAFTAH AFFI DEH BOUT INNA DI PLACE...!!

GhettoGurl · #6 (**permalink**) 11-25-2007, 02:02 PM

I vote for Jomo's Girl.. or was she a mormon?

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
ETJ year in Review!!!	LuvJamaicanMen	General Discussions	37	09-29-2008 05:18 AM
what do you plan to do this new year	Hotgal01	General Discussions	5	01-03-2007 01:45 AM
66 year old Romanian woman has given birth	Dreadlion	Jamaica News	32	01-05-2006 12:12 AM
Faking orgasm(neraly half of 18-34 year olds do it heres how)	cyborg	Family, Relationships & Advice	36	01-27-2005 12:50 PM