YES its finished Lilly!!!! OMG its soooooooooooo finished! Don't let him have the upper hand! Cut it off NOW while YOU have it. He doesn't deserve the chance to explain.

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Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.

But I deserve an explanation, Jammie. He owes me that much.

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You do, Lilly - but you won't get one that will satisfy you. When my ex pulled his crap and went to Ca with the other woman, he still lied to me - I never got the full explanation that I deserved - even years later, when we sat down to talk about what had happened, I can now realize that I didn't get the honest truth - I got what he wanted me to hear. My finale was sending him a lengthy email, laying it on the line, spilling everything I ever wanted to say, and putting it behind a closed door. It took me 3 years to realize that he will never give me the full truth.

As for his sister - not trying to say anything bad about her - but she's his sister. I have another ex that I was close with his sister - but everything that she tells me is geared towards what he needs, or to get him what he wants - and to try to keep me on a string - I am done with him, he has shown his true colors = I still talk to her once in a while, but I know that ultimately, if push came to shove, she'll always be there for him, not me - blood is thicker than water.

You deserve an explanation, you didn't deserve any of this to happen to you = but you won't get closure from him. You need to find closure within yourself - whether it's writing it here, sending him a letter, screaming, getting rip roaring drunk, whatever it takes - It's up to you to make your own closure.

Lilly if you truly believe that his explanation will be the Truth, then maybe it would bennefit you to hear it....however given what you have experienced from both Corey and his family, could you believe any explanation that any of them now give?...just as he sat in that conference call making out that you were the one chasing him, the same man is now doing a major U turn when things have fallen through with the other woman.......his motives are seriously questionable. I have so much more to say, but I am mindful that the timing may not be right.......someone on here, I think maybe Miss B had a signature that is so applicable in this case "If someone shows you who they are.....believe them"!

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You're right 1stP and RD . . . I already have the truth. What does "the story" matter?

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Lilly see "The Secret" in the General section....I hope it helps

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Have you watched this 1stP? I need to watch it . . . am drawn to see it.

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Yes Lilly I have watched the DVD and I intend to buy the book.....the story is really nothing new but its put in such a way that it makes you take a long hard look at your life experiences and all of a sudden you start to make sense of things that had happened, see patterns of behaviour about yourself and your choices...it enables you to re-claim the power and control over your life, you dont feel so helpless because really YOU have the power to change what ever you want to if you truly believe!....because you love yourself you will want only good things for yourself and you will draw those things to you...... that is the secret....the LAW of attraction is to practice BELIEVING!!!

PS Lilly there are better extracts 25 mins or so to be found on You Tube

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How will ever really know what happened with the other woman Lily Maybe she kicked his ass to the curb and now he is trying to salvage things with you......I know its hard to think about, I KNOW! I have my own situation that i have had to take a long hard look at. As far as closure...you will never get it from him...I have had a few realtionships with Jamaican men and I only speak from my own experience...but these men I know don't ever close a door. If you need closure you will have to make your own. If you allow him to explain he will no doubt continue to spin the web of lies. The explanation will distract you from what he really did which was to choose her over you. And if you forgive him when he will he choose some one else that beneifits him more. I know how hard these things are to look at because I have had to look at them myself. I still don't know, but I have decided its better not to. When you ready you will see this too. If you want support I would love to talk privately with you.

Thanks, HT, 1stP, and MissB.

It's such a long road back . . . I thought I had made it "home", but I'm in the forest again. I just want to put it all behind me and continue with my life -- MY LIFE.

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I don't know much... but I know I luv you...
& that may be all I need to know!

Lilly, knowing where you are right now and what you still want to know, if it were me, I would let him call me and explain.

Why? Well, first of all, remember what I said about not caving and making him make the efforts. But, why would I let him call me? Because I KNOW you know what is the truth, what is off, and what are lies. And, I also KNOW you know what happened along the way. And, while I know you are working out some feelings, I also KNOW you know there is no future here. Knowing all that, I would let him call me and give me some half a$$ explanation because all it would do would seal his fate and help me get over it a little easier.

I do not believe he thinks you know what you know and I also do not think he has any clue how deeply he has hurt you. I think he will get all tangled in a web of lies that you will see right through. Especially if he says any of the things Mali said....things you alread see are contradictory and some outright lies. When he does spin the tales of lies, you will have your answers.

Sorry Lill, I don't mean to sound blunt or uncaring. Just in my experience, it won't do you any good to have the "story" or an explanation. The point is he did it, its done...period....yesterday's laundry. I know what its like to love someone and have them leave for a crap-ass reason but you NEED to be able to cut him off or you won't heal. Just do it girl.....by giving him a chance to explain you are STILLLLLL giving him the upper hand! You're stronger than that!!!!!

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Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.