The Guy's Side: Finally, the guy's side of the story. I must admit it's pretty good. We always hear "the rules" from the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

2. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

3. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

4. Crying is blackmail.

5. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

6. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

7. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

8. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

9. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

10. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

11. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

12. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

13. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it
done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

14. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

15. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

16. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

17. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

18. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you might be lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

19. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

20. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

21. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

22. You have enough clothes.

23. You have too many shoes.

24. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping.

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I like your views on these matters,especially about sleeping on the couch . I get 'sleeping on the couch' threats just about once a month, and let me tell you, one day I will take her seriously.

One thing is for sure, we are definately from Mars and they are from pluto(the ice planet) . I think I should score good points with that one .

kc, thanks for clearing up the gender differences when it comes to rules. i laughed out loud when i read them.

i am sure that you are well aware that "we" women will still expect "you" men to answer those silly questions appropriately. i know it doesn't make any sense, but we just need some reassurance, that's all. and yes, we do realize that we're losing the toilet seat battle. i know that it's a simple thing to put the seat back down when it's our turn, but who thinks about even checking for that at 3am when you're half-sleep and have to pee real bad? let me tell you that you haven't seen a woman's wrath unless she's fallen in the toilet water in the middle of the night and now has to take a shower.

and if we tell you that there's a difference between periwinkle and lavendar...just take our word for it.

LOL so how big is your toilet? Experienced I see.

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Hi everyone. I am new here. KC, your post gave me some good laughs. Seriously, men and women do things differently, no problem with that, if not gays would be the norm. The problem surfaces when we dont realize the differences and dont try to (1) communicate the things that our partner does that bothers us, (2) ask what is it that we do that bothers our partner, and (3) try and please our partner by learning to get over the differences.

Us men tend to think it works one way. While we thought we were the Dons/Bosses and knew everything, women are a mystery. Watch them and learn. Sometimes they just want an ear. Listen, nod, show pity and ask a supportive question or two. After a few minutes you will hear.. "thanks for everything". Didnt do anything, dont worry.

Living with a woman, we have to learn that especially during certain times of the month, be on your guard, PUT THE SEAT DOWN, it can save your life.

Finally, men in general have their issues, Jamaican men are no different, with certain peculiarities that stem from slavery.

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One World, One People

The opinions expressed by Samba are not the official opinions of ETJ or its owners.

I see I have miss quite much...cause KC, samba...you all are on a roll...lol...Now that toilet seat deal...you a big man....when u finish....place the seat down...thats all you have to do...please....stop being childish on this toilet seat matter...men !!! I dont do sports//// if he likes sport...fine...but Im sure I can tackle him too...lol..we strive on clothes...women STRIVE ON CLOTHES!!! you take that away/...that leaves us nakiid!!!....lol...tell u what KC...leave your wallet on the table....u sat down in your big lazyboy recliner...watch a lil sports..let your woman kiss you on the cheek....as she glides towards the door...on her way shoppin for whatever she damn well please because if she doesnt "THAT COUCH WILL BECOME YOUR HOME"...LOL....but we do love ya!!

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E§TORMNever underestimate the power of a woman .

KC that was very well put. Do you get paid for this because if you don't you should!
I liked all your little bits of advice and to me none of them are major issues. I've learned to ignore the small stuff, which all of that is.....just small stuff. In the bigger picture is it really worth it? Seriously.....I've seen the toilet seat and football lead to divorces! Was it worth it?
I love watching my man get excited during a football game. I also love watching him shave his face....he looks so cute like Santa Claus, so WHO CARES if he leaves his little shavings all over the bathroom? As long as he's comin to bed with me at night.

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Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.

Estorm, I am not a perfect man nor husband, but I do try to do the little things and fall short sometimes, but I think if I can take care of the little things like paying for yor shopping sprees etc. Plus taking care of the big thing like remaining faithful, respecting, cherishing and loving her then you women can all over look a simple toilet seat.

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Samba welcome! I have admired your several posting on the matters of relationships and genderization.

I agree that communication will help to minimize problems in any relationship and if we are all honest then small things or big things won't be so detrimental.

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KC, I must say, its a shame that I am at work and I have to suppress my true laughter in the sense that I have to be dignified. However, despite the fact that those rules are funny and they are true and I believe that in a true relationship, once a person communicates as Samba says and cooperate and be considerate of each other's space then of course that relationship will work and I think there would be no need for the couch. My boyfriend, when we first started dating I knew that Sunday and Monday nights are football nights so I never dare step in his spotlight. The gym and sports are a part of him and I try never to interfere. So we work around that, just like us ladies we have a set time sometime for a certain activity, although I must say a woman's work is never done, but I still believe men and Women can live together in peace once they have both understand each other and their space.

AM I RIGHT?

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Lovergirl

WHATEVER to that list!

Seems like you wear the pants in your relationship Nandii, you are the boss and the supervisor. Anyway despite your 'lip' these are some of the things a guy appreciates.

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Are you bored, KC? Trying to pick a fight? Because you KNOW what happens once I get started. I wouldn't say that I wear the pants in my relationship but I do know when to be genteel and when to be assertive. So, you could say that I do know how to manage my relationship well so that my man thinks he's running the show. That's all that's important anyway, the illusion of control. I do have an opinion on that list but I don't really think you want to hear it. As it is, you already think I have too much "lip."

all I want to say is that men should run a relationship that means despite all the bull**** that a woman dishes out, men need to pres on and keep the relationship floating by making sacrifices and agree even when you really don't cause women are creatures whom don't beleive in giving up their 'opinions'.

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KC, that was sweet of you, but what about Compromise in a realtionship. If two people have logical reasons for not doing something and they are totally different, I believe in doing or agreeing on something that works for both.

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Lovergirl