Well i was serious you know. Serious about us. I knew it would take work and effort and more work on my part because I had more then he does. I make more money on unemployment then he does on a job. I told him though I dont have any money Im not rich. He hated how I spent money to stay at hotel or villas. To spend money on food. Meanwhile I love JA and I said way before I met him I could have a second home there. Always said that. SO I thought this was it. This was the chance to start to make that happen. I saw business opportunites, not that would make me rich, but I could sustain a lifestyle there. I would have my business here in the states and I could make it work. Here is when I stop telling the story to people. Here is when things change.
I spoke to a villa owner about renting the room on a monthly basisas we agreed. It would be much cheaper then what I spend on a hotel or villa in a week. He could pay what his rent is to the room and I would put in the rest. It would be closer to work for him and I would always have a place to stay. But when it came time to make the decision he said no. He didnt want me to be responsible for that. to feel like I was paying for him to live somewhere. Okay I respect that. But then also he says Im scared. What are you scared about? technically I am the one putting a whole lot on the line here why are you scared? I was pissed because we talked about it and made the decison together. I aproached the woman about it and then he decides its not the right thing. Fine okay. The I start to notice little things that just bother me. Like the fact that he never has his phone around. Never hear it ring never see him answer it. Okay so I joke with him why you dont want to have to talk to your wife while Im here. haha funny funny dont say things like that thats not true is what he tells me. Okay I want to see where you live. No you dont. Well I do finally see where he lives and its not pretty to say the least. SO I can understand someone not wanting to share that. I asked him before if he told his mom about me. Yes I did. So when am I going to get to meet her? Well its hard to get there we have to plan the day to go all the way to St Mary. So when I was there one day hes talking to his mom on the phone and tells her "Mom I have a girlfriend I want you to meet her name is Michelle she is really down to earth and I think youll like her." Um I thought she knew about me. Oh she did but not your name. oh ok. Hey I have a friend who never ever tells her mother about any guy shes dating. Says her mom is not meeting the guy until they are getting married. Shes Jamaican too maybe thats how they roll? But now when I am home I cant never seem to get through to him. I call him and I know Digicel be acting up but that much??? Then I call him and leave a message to call me back but he usually doesnt. Or maybe I just keep on trying until I get him. I understand its hard money wise but if he calls I am willing to call him back and he knows this.
So lately I havent really spoke to him. My last trip was the wedding and everyone was like aww you guys are next you guys are next. And beiong the person I am I was like no we are not no we are not. We were in the kitchen one day and he says "Will you marry me?' And I ask is that a real question??? Well talk about getting married and who we would invite and living together and all that stuff. But then hell say well we have to take it slow we are still getting to know each other. You want me to marry you fast like your friend did?????
And when I first told him about my friends wedding he was like "oh no somethings not right about that."